Forum: Rants
Topic: People who have trouble thinking.
started by: WillyPete

Posted by WillyPete on Jun. 06 2002,13:20
Started off with a great Jubilee weekend holiday by borrowing my folks' car, going to the coast with a buddy and then surfing. (Yes, in England)

Yesterday, after work, I drove from London for 3 hours through shitty torrential rain to take the car back to them.

Got there at 10:30pm, caught the last train back. Dumped in the center of London at 1:30am (facing an 8am start later the same morning) Gave up on night buses (tube closes 12pm) and finally caught a taxi back.

Next day: You've got mail!
Her:
'Hi, why didn't you call last night?'

Me:
'Actually I was on the Motorway in torrential rain.
I took my folks car back to Solihull. Got back home at 2:30 am. Didn't think you appreciate a call at that time.'


Later, from her:
'Send me a nice long message please'

That's it, that's all her email says. No 'long message' from her. just a demand for attention. Was I not clear in my first reply? FUCK!

Maybe this will make it clear to her:

'I'd like nothing more than to be able to this, but I'm really busy right now. There's 2 of us doing 4 people's work and I'm really tired. I took my mum's car back at 7pm last night, drove through torrential rains in a shitty car and caught the last train back which dumped me in the center of London at 1:30 am. I only got home at 2:30am.
Unfortunately, aside from all my griping, I'm not in a state to write much of interest as all that's keeping me going is a 4:30pm hometime and the promise of a soft bed.

Hope you can understand.
Pete.'

I'm just dying to see how she takes that. I think I'm close to the final chapter in this long distance relationship.

Thing is, do I care?
(Hint: I already know the answer to this one.)
Posted by WillyPete on Jun. 06 2002,13:43
Oh yay:

'F**K off  - don't take your tiredness and irritability out on me!'

And my reply:
'I knew you'd read that wrong.

I just wanted to explain why I couldn't ok?
You asked me for a long message and I can't deliver, all right?
If you'd read what I said instead of what you think I said, you'd see exactly that.

Honestly, I'm knackered and I just don't have the time to do this right now. I told you earlier where I was last night and when I got home.
If you can't understand that then I'm afraid I can't help you.

Pete.'


"...and all the king's horses and all the king's men..."
Posted by kuru on Jun. 06 2002,14:55
If she responds again to tell you that you're wrong, tell that cunt to eat shit.
Posted by Wolfguard on Jun. 06 2002,15:20
its so good to know that all woman are not nuts
Posted by WillyPete on Jun. 06 2002,17:12
Ok, so I'm not the only one that thinks I didn't say anything to elicit such a reply from her.

It's the end of my work day now and I can look forward on catching up on my sleep. (It's cheap and oh, so good!;)

The only thing that still worries me about this whole issue, is that right now, because of this,  I want her to go away. I don't have any reason to go to Cardiff (WALES), so there's no chance of accidentally seeing her again. No hassle there.
Problem is, as all us guys know, if I ignore her and don't call her tonight or send her an email (Don't worry I won't) she'll call me. When guys treat girls like shit, they ALWAYS go back to them. Thing is I don't want that. And the more I act like a cunt, the more she'll pester me. Isn't it ironic?

Shit, being involved in a land war in Asia would be far easier to deal with than long distance relationships.
That fucking Sicillian had it wrong.
Where's that friggin eject button?
Posted by Wolfguard on Jun. 06 2002,17:26
well, you know what you have to do.

Poison both glasses...
Posted by kuru on Jun. 06 2002,18:31
When she calls, don't answer.

If someone else does, hang up on her.

Don't reply to her e-mails.

You need to get the point across.
Posted by incubus on Jun. 06 2002,20:09
kuru = teh love surgeon

;)
Posted by kuru on Jun. 06 2002,20:48
And Pete needs to remove this tumor from his life.
Posted by Nikita on Jun. 06 2002,20:51
Assuming you told her what your plans were for the weekend, she's being needy.  If I want a long email, I write a long email - not just a "write me lots of goop - show me some love"  The way she worded her first response makes it sound like you owe her something.

Your first reply didn't contain much affection.  Bad sign for the relationship - but since you say that it's in the final stages ....  I don't mean to say that you should be all apologetic, but at least a "sure, I'll write you later when things settle down a bit"  The first sentence was good - she should be a bit more understanding!  You were tired, but I didn't pick up any "irritability" from you.

Maybe she's just having a really really #*$*@$ bad day and was hoping you'd be there (in whatever way) for her?  Let things calm down for the next day or so and see what happens.  Everyone gets unwanted/selfish outbursts at times.

If you really really really don't want to have anything to do with her, do what the others recommend ... though not the poisoning part ... :)
Posted by kuru on Jun. 06 2002,22:57
Got to disagree here Nikita.

I think she's just being a total cunt about the whole thing and he shouldn't have to show her one damned bit of understanding because it's quite obvious she's never showed him any.

No way in hell and damnation should Pete start kowtowing to her and being 'more understanding' because she insists on being a greedy, selfish, attention hogging bitch.

Two different e-mails demanded his attention no matter how tired he was or how badly he was feeling.

Time to dump the hag.
Posted by Wiley on Jun. 06 2002,23:54
sheesh   ...and I thought I was the pig here.  I guess if I go home and my wife doesn't have dinner waiting for me I should just smack her and kick her ass out   ...the heartless, selfish bitch.

Willy, if you think that going out of your way to show some affection to your lady is too much work and you want out, then by all means call her up and end it.  Be a man damnit!  If you don't want to be in a relationship then end it.
Relationships = personal sacrifices

And chicks only get on your nerves when it's over and  you no longer want them  ...until then you will put up with all kinds of shit.
Posted by liquid metal on Jun. 06 2002,23:58
didn't you know that the only reason men are around is to be nice to women?
i "nicely" explained that to my friend one night after a long day at work.
Posted by Beldurin on Jun. 07 2002,00:07
Quote (Wiley @ 06 June 2002,17:54)
sheesh   ...and I thought I was the pig here.  I guess if I go home and my wife doesn't have dinner waiting for me I should just smack her and kick her ass out   ...the heartless, selfish bitch.

Willy, if you think that going out of your way to show some affection to your lady is too much work and you want out, then by all means call her up and end it.  Be a man damnit!  If you don't want to be in a relationship then end it.
Relationships = personal sacrifices

And chicks only get on your nerves when it's over and  you no longer want them  ...until then you will put up with all kinds of shit.

baaa.gif

I agree w/Wiley
Posted by kuru on Jun. 07 2002,02:17
Yeah but why will you put up with all kinds of shit?

Why do men believe they have to allow women to treat them like shit, walk all over them, emotionally manipulate them, apologize for all the things the chick does wrong, believe that the chick is always right, always be the one who is 'understanding' of her flaws and bad moods, kiss her ass on a daily basis, end up at the all night florist at the 24-hour grocery store buying flowers because they forgot it was her goldfish's birthday...

IMO, men are expected to put up with far, far too much shit from women. And they're fools for doing it.
Posted by demonk on Jun. 07 2002,03:56
I agree with kuru there.  I spent the last 4 years basicly letting a girl walk all over me and I loved her for it.  It recked my self esteme and my ability to function like a normal person.  I even pined for her for a whole month after she cheated on me and left me.  But I got over it with some help from friends, family, and a book I found.  Now, I look back and I just say "Why the fuck did I let her do that to me?  It's not like I got anything in return except more shit."  No more.  Never again.  Kuru, there is at least one more guy in the world who will never again let a woman walk over him.  That goes for all women, everywhere.  

My recomondation to you Willy is to not let her walk over you.  There is a difference between doing someone for someone to be nice, and doing it because she's overbearing, needy, and manipulative.  Always ask youself "why am I doing this?  Am I doing this because I want to do it, or because someone is forcing me to do it?".
Posted by WillyPete on Jun. 07 2002,08:59
Quote (kuru @ 06 June 2002,18:17)
Yeah but why will you put up with all kinds of shit?

Uh, for sex?

I assure you guys it's purely physical. I was open to the option of advancing it, but this kind of puts a damper on it.
Essentially, this isn't the first time this girl has attached her own meaning to what I've said. Even after my blatant warnings for her to do the girly thing and read between the lines. I always tell people I meet just that. If I'm tired, I'm just tired, not tired of them, if I'm hungry I want to eat and if I'm ok, I'm ok.

Wiley, (PS: I'm not attacking you or your opinion, just making the case a little more clear to you seeing as you brought these points up) I'm not one afraid to show some attention to someone, but when I am busy and tired, I'm not going to gloss over it and act like I'm not. Particularly when my first email would help most rational people realise that I would be tired and not really in a position to cater to their whims.

Her 'write me a long message' request wasn't there for me send her something flowery or be nice, it was a call from her for attention. I know that and anyone here can see that. It was VERY self centered and took no consideration for how I might feel.  To be honest yesterday was not the day for people to be asking me for that. I tried to explain it in way,that wouldn't come across as nasty but it had it's head pulled through its arse by her translation. My first mistake was in NOT lying to her and telling her sunny day and daisy stories, but you know what, some days it DOES rain.

Personally, I'd prefer someone telling me straight out they're tired than spending time on me that would be better spent doing their work and getting rest, or whatever it is they want to do. You might say that they're sacrificing themselves for you, but the fact is, they're not. They're lying to you to appease you.
I'd rather NOT have someone lie to me, especially regarding them spending time with me when they'd rather be elsewhere, and I obviously act that way to people.
It's a part of me that's not going to change, and thereby, anyone wanting to establish a relationship with me either as a friend or as a partner, can rely on that as a constant and hopefully feel a little more secure in the knowledge of where they stand and how I feel at any given time.

Also, your call to 'be a man' is a little early. I don't normally beat around the bush either. I didn't consider it over, this episode was merely a signpost on my personal highway that said 'Exit Ahead - Prepare to change lanes'. It's one of those instances when you realise you're going to have to make a decision soon. When I do, yes I will act like a man and say it straight.

In the way of an update, no I didn't call. No email yet. I'm quite happy to let her cool her heels. words said in anger and all that.
Posted by WillyPete on Jun. 07 2002,10:03
The clincher.

Her this morning via email, no other contact prior to this:
What time are you arriving in Cardiff today?

H x


Again, that's all.
Colour me puzzled, but did yesterday not happen?
I look back at the contents of those emails, and I swear to God it's so bizarre. What you see here is what I copied  directly from the mail. I left nothing out but her name. If I didn't have the original email I wouldn't have believed it.

I keep hearing that song by the Clash in my head: "Should I stay or should I go?"

"Should I stay or should I go now?
Should I stay or should I go now?
If I go there will be trouble
An' if I stay it will be double
So come on and let me know

Should I stay or should I go?"

Anyway, I'm on call this w/end and was taking a chance when I said I might go down.

Guess it's 'MAN time', eh Wylie?
Posted by kuru on Jun. 07 2002,12:07
I wouldn't go. I'd tell her to piss up a rope.
Posted by WillyPete on Jun. 07 2002,12:33
No I'm not and I explained it.

Anyway, seeing as the initial rant is over, I'll not trouble you guys with any more email copies. It always kinda bugged me when other people did that.

Oh well.

Anyway, England v Argentina is on now. If Argentina cheat again I'll be posting madly on the rants forum.
Posted by WillyPete on Jun. 07 2002,14:36
England win.

Worldpeace and cold fusion are the only things remaining to be achieved.
Posted by Jimi on Jun. 07 2002,15:58
Ha ha, I would love to have your GirlFriend because it is exactly that sort of behaviour that makes me laugh.

If I ever recieved an E-Mail telling me to "Send me a big E-Mail" My reply would either consist of

Dear X

Bah!

From Jimi

or I'd just laugh at her and not bother.
Posted by incubus on Jun. 07 2002,16:32
Quote (WillyPete @ 07 June 2002,06:36)
England win.

Worldpeace and cold fusion are the only things remaining to be achieved.

seconded.
Posted by veistran on Jun. 08 2002,05:27
what about cricket? :p
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