Topic: Curiosity - A Question or two
started by: Mhoraigh
Posted by Mhoraigh on May 28 2002,09:20
Ok, guys.........when you're actually inside is it just a thing of pumping until you're done or do you actually continue to pay attention to her and play while that's going on?Girls, do you like guys to play or do you prefer just pumping away like it's a job (can you tell my preference from how I phrased that)?
I dunno, I've only been with one guy, but it really feels like it ought to be a little less mechanical once you get past the merely playing.....
Posted by damien_s_lucifer on May 28 2002,11:11
< Quite possibly the best book ever written on this subject. >mechanical sex sucks. one girl I dated kept her eyes closed the entire time... she enjoyed it, but it made me feel like I was just an oil pump or something.
it's all about playing, laughing, talking, wrestling, whatever feels good, and you should be doing that the entire time... it shouldn't stop once you begin THE ACT, and it shouldn't stop even after you're through.
Posted by kuru on May 28 2002,12:14
If a guy is going to do his best impersonation of a jackhammer, I am gonna throw him out of bed.I've only had to do that once. So the majority of guys that I've slept with apparently aren't into the 'mechanical' sex thing. Some of them even talked geeky during sex, and that was really cool.
Posted by Wiley on May 28 2002,15:47
I just go in and out at 3/4 of a second intervals. A nice steady rate. I try and stay as stiff as possible to make sure every thrust feels the same. And I don't do any foreplay as that would cut into my mechanical pumping time.Seriously though, it sounds like your dude just sucks. Were you his first as well? Two virgins going at it for the first time is like trying to learn to swin in a hot tub. Usually after the first stroke you're at the end ...at least the guy is. You gotta be vocal, tell the guy what you want. I hate it when girls won't tell me what they're into, makes it seem like they don't even care to be there. When that happens I usually just pay them their money and leave.
Posted by kuru on May 28 2002,16:29
| Quote |
| Wiley said: I just go in and out at 3/4 of a second intervals. A nice steady rate. I try and stay as stiff as possible to make sure every thrust feels the same. And I don't do any foreplay as that would cut into my mechanical pumping time. |
If a guy did that to me, I'd toss his ass out of the room and handle things myself.
Course your next paragraph contradicts that entirely, since you say you want the chick to tell you what she wants.
But that whole 'pump like a metronome' thing is about as exciting as dental work.
Posted by Wolfguard on May 28 2002,16:46
A slight study of anatomy does help you out with knowing what works and why. I just pay attention to what im doing and how it is working for her. I always make sure that she wants to come back for another ride
Posted by Wiley on May 28 2002,17:38
| Quote (kuru @ 28 May 2002,08:29) |
| Course your next paragraph contradicts that entirely, since you say you want the chick to tell you what she wants. |
The first paragraph was kinda sarcastic because the entire question asked in this thread is just stupid ...everybody who is worth their salt in the sack knows that machanicaly pumping away is just not the way to get the job done. You gotta get creative ...keep changing it up.
Posted by kuru on May 28 2002,17:45
Your sarcasm got by the radar because having met one guy who actually DID believe in that philosophy, I'm susceptible to believing there are others.
Posted by The_Stomper on May 28 2002,18:13
For the good of all women; and all men too; I certainly hope you executed him on the spot. Guys like that give the rest of us a bad reputation, and of course they give the girl a bad time. 
Dammit ... DSL beat me to linking to that book. Seriously though folks ... buy a copy and read it. Know it. Use it. Your wife/girlfriend (or in Wiley's case, prostitute - couldn't resist
) will thank you greatly.
Posted by Necromancer on May 28 2002,18:27
just remember people the key to butt sex is the withdrawl NOT the insertion.
Posted by Beldurin on May 28 2002,18:58
A lot of it depends on the woman. I remember two especially that, when they got close, that's what they wanted: a steady, unchanging rhythm. However, up to that point, anything went. I generally try to focus on what makes her feel good, it makes me feel good because I'm pleasing her, and it also helps to delay the inevitable a little while, thus prolonging the fun time. Edit: Necro, I thought the key to butt sex was lubrication?
Posted by WillyPete on May 28 2002,19:14
Call me weird and psychoanalyse all you want about feeling the need to impress others due to lack of confidence (it's been done), but I really get off when SHE gets off. I've gone some sessions without climaxing jsut for the sheer pleasure of watching her have one. (Mind you I get my own back later...)The biggest turn on is when the girl just does what she wants and tells me too. Not that I need instruction. My partners (the few I've had) have always thought I'd slept around a lot to know what I do. It's just down to knowing what's where and how to do it.
A bad hand job from a girl will let you know what it's like for them when you don't know what you 're doing. To be honest, the best research aource is your sisters/mom's Cosmo.
It's not a wrestling match, it's not a bingo list of positions (remember, in porn, they do the different styles in different takes), it's not about forcing her to gag by throwing your tongue down her throat, and the nipples aren't radio dials for you to find a rock station with.
My best reasoning is that I treat it like my ice cream - I eat good ice cream with a teaspoon just so the good stuff lasts longer. I take my time.
Anyway, why did you ask Moraigh? You need us to have a chat with your guy?
Posted by Mhoraigh on May 29 2002,22:28
Well, I'm not with him any more....I was just curious since he's the only partner I've been with...well...past the playing.I suspect he's much better at it and was just trying to go slow with me or something, thanks to my fear factor - he's a good guy and I'll give him the benefit of the doubt..... I just wanted an outside view.
Posted by demonk on May 29 2002,22:45
Speaking of fear, I've been trying to understand why most girls are afraid of their first time. Is it because of the pain? Or is it a fear of how society will view you after the act? For the guys, we don't have the pain or the social stigma that goes with it. We are afraid of other things such as her getting pregnant or us getting an STD. Just another random thought.
Posted by CatKnight on May 29 2002,23:05
my girl is extremely ticklish. so what i do is during sex i will tickle her, because then she has to decide whether to squirm away or keep fucking
Posted by demonk on May 29 2002,23:10
Heh, I like your style CK.
Posted by kuru on May 29 2002,23:11
| Quote |
| Speaking of fear, I've been trying to understand why most girls are afraid of their first time. Is it because of the pain? Or is it a fear of how society will view you after the act? |
I have no idea, cause I was never faced with either of those. I wasn't afraid it would hurt (and it didn't....in fact I mauled the guy. He got no sleep. I did him 7 times that night and went for 8 and 9 in the morning.) and social stigma has not really ever been a concern of mine.
WTF would I care if people are going to think less of me for engaging in a natural, satisfying act?
Posted by Mhoraigh on May 29 2002,23:46
Fear = pain, letting myself go, STDs (including pregancy), attachment, becoming like multiple friends who went psycho-slut when they lost their virginity.
Posted by demonk on May 30 2002,00:52
so, other than the STDs (including pregnancy), basicly girls are afraid of themselves. Ok, that helps me understand females a bit better. Thanks.
Posted by Wiley on May 30 2002,01:14
| Quote (The_Stomper @ 28 May 2002,10:13) |
| Use it. Your wife/girlfriend (or in Wiley's case, prostitute ) |
They like to be called Escorts
Posted by kuru on May 30 2002,02:08
You must not be a big tipper... my one dude friend says he's a big tipper....and he gets to call them whatever he wants....
Posted by editor on May 30 2002,05:17
I always call them Jennifer.
Posted by The_Stomper on May 30 2002,06:09
| Quote (WillyPete @ 28 May 2002,14:14) |
| Call me weird and psychoanalyse all you want about feeling the need to impress others due to lack of confidence (it's been done), but I really get off when SHE gets off. I've gone some sessions without climaxing jsut for the sheer pleasure of watching her have one. (Mind you I get my own back later...) |
Call me egotistical if you want, but I'm that way too. Nothing drives me crazier than the feeling of a girl's fingers digging into my back, the sound of her screaming in ecstasy, and the sight of her arching her back and rolling her eyes back.
CK - see, that only works if you're not ticklish too. I'm actually far more ticklish than my g/f so if I ever try that she just gets me back far worse.
Posted by Mhoraigh on May 30 2002,08:24
| Quote (editor @ 29 May 2002,21:17) |
| I always call them Jennifer. |
Well, if they're in their mid-twenties you have a good chance of getting their name right, since Jennifer was the most popular name for about 3 years around 1977...then it came in second to Stephanie for the years surrounding ...
Posted by Mhoraigh on May 30 2002,08:29
| Quote (demonk @ 29 May 2002,16:52) |
| so, other than the STDs (including pregnancy), basicly girls are afraid of themselves. Ok, that helps me understand females a bit better. Thanks. |
Dude, I never claimed to understand women...why do you think I date guys!! They make much more sense for the most part.
And my response to the fear factor is uniquely mine, I've only met a few women who agree with me on the reasons. I am very afraid of being me...it's hard to explain so I won't go into that here...
Posted by editor on May 30 2002,08:36
No, the one that I can't get out of my head is Jennifer.Uh, yah.
Posted by editor on May 30 2002,08:37
Oh sorry, just noticed that.heh
Posted by Carnivore on May 30 2002,14:17
| Quote (Mhoraigh @ 28 May 2002,01:20) |
| Ok, guys.........when you're actually inside is it just a thing of pumping until you're done |
Ummm I think if you end up doing that you might have a suprise in about 9 months!
Posted by WillyPete on May 30 2002,14:56
Moraigh, EVERYONE's afraid of something about themselves. Either discovering it or have others discover it.Most of these fears are created by our upbringing.
eg: Someone from a puritnaical upbringing, even though they may be in a healthy marriage, may be scared of feelings of arousal or strong sexual urges, merely because they were taught such feelings came from evil.
Hence the huge number of monasteries in meieval times - guys hid from themselves and the world.
Analogy time: In South Africa, I was doing some service work in one of the coloured townships near Cape Town. I was big into my photography at the time and found great subject matter every day. Used to carry my camera in the trunk all the time.
We turned a corner one day to see people running to a minivan parked on the median. Realising an accident had just happened we parked and got out to help.
A girl about 13 had been hit by the thing and she was lying, counscious and in shock, in the middle of the skidmarks. Bad damage.
All we could do was try and comfort her and cover her with a blanket. Serious head injury as blood was coming from her ear. bad fractures to her arm - didn't want to risk moving her because of possible damage to spine etc.
Anyway, once we did what we could I had an urge to get my camera.
Days later this was still bugging me. I thought I was a callous bastard for thinking it would be a great time for some dramatic shots of the human element.
I had to come to terms with this and it took me a while. I'm not heartless, I realise I just wanted to report or convey to others the emotion of the scene. I didn't want to glamourise it.
There's things in each of us that will emerge from time to time, and if you're not content with who you are, your reactions to these discoveries may fuck you up.
You need to ground yourself in who you are and what you want to be to help you through such times. Don't be too surprised by what you find. Rationally, find a reason for why you react/think the way you do. There's the beast and the god within each of us and they both like to come out and play. You gotta cater to both, but in equal parts.
/end ramble.
Posted by Mhoraigh on May 31 2002,06:50
Wow......most of your post has me speechless......very well written and very valid points........the only bit I have to argue with is the reason there were monasteries in medieval times..........as that's my area of study I have a bit of a different perspective than they needed to hide themselves away........I won't go into it, but there was a lot going on in that period that our present society could never understand and you statement oversimplified it and left out some major factors.
Posted by editor on May 31 2002,07:05
Post of the week, from WP.
Posted by WillyPete on May 31 2002,12:47
Cheers ed.(thought it might hit a chord with you being behind the viewfinder so often)
And Moraigh, yeah I did oversimplify, but I guess in the context I used it in you might let me get away with it?
Pur-lease?
Posted by Mhoraigh on May 31 2002,19:57
I don't know........I'm really picky about correctly presenting the middle ages and renaissance.......but I guess JUST this time...
Posted by WillyPete on Jun. 05 2002,11:28
Phew, got away by the skin of my...
Posted by editor on Jun. 05 2002,19:54
...dick.I love this thread.
Posted by WillyPete on Jun. 06 2002,14:47
Warning Will Robinson! Potential thread crossing Alert!"EGON
There's something very important I forgot to tell you.
PETER
What?
EGON
Don't cross the THREADS.
PETER
Why?
EGON
It would be bad.
PETER
I'm fuzzy on the whole good-bad thing. What do you mean, bad?
EGON
Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.
RAY
Total protonic reversal.
PETER
All right, that's bad, okay. Important safety tip, don't cross the streams. Thanks, Egon."
Posted by incubus on Jun. 06 2002,20:18
Dammit, great thread and I missed it. Must pay more attention in future.
Posted by kuru on Jun. 06 2002,20:50
Egon is so sexy.*sigh*
I
geeks.
Posted by WillyPete on Jun. 07 2002,09:14
Which one?
or
Is it me or did the toon get a bleach job?
Pity more girls don't like the goof types. It's no coincidence Bill Murray's character's also called Pete.
Well, someday. Jocks and geeks have already been made popular, only goofs left to go now.
Posted by kuru on Jun. 07 2002,19:45
I like goofs, just don't find Bill Murray physically attractive.Oh, and I like the live-action Egon better than the toon.
Posted by Marauder on Jun. 17 2002,21:34
Back to the original topic, the way I heard it was:Be old fashioned: Ladies go first. Besides, I'd feel like a real heel if I just finished up and rolled off her.
Posted by ^Oni^ on Jun. 17 2002,22:29
The one place that being a drummer has practical applications in life is in the bedroom. We can coordinate our limbs to do different things at the same time unattended. My ex had usually had an orgasm or two before we even started anything else.I'm a giver. Though, I do get taken advantage of for being that way.
Posted by demonk on Jun. 17 2002,22:58
I'm a big giver too. My ex never went away unsatisfied (unless she chose to be unsatisfied). But you know what I discovered? Being a giver means almost always never getting. So, to all the women of the world, you pissed me off for the last time. I will never again be a pure giver, because I never got anything back. From now on, I'm just like all the other guys in the world: I take.