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Question: And the healing begins... :: Total Votes:26
Poll choices Votes Statistics
Tell Jess 6  [23.08%]
Don't tell Jess 14  [53.85%]
Autobuy isn't working 6  [23.08%]
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Topic: And the healing begins..., end of the dry spell< Next Oldest | Next Newest >
 Post Number: 1
Uberkommando Search for posts by this member.
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PostIcon Posted on: May 19 2002,07:23  Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Typing this at 1 AM after 4 hours of sleep last night -- some words will be missing.

To sum up my romance life of the past 8 months: Jess, my gf in Germany, broke up with me two months ago after i went to see her, and as of last week, is going out with one of my best friends. He's a Jehova's Witness (seriously), so I don't really mind all too much, since not much will probably happen there. I still love Jess, and she loves me -- the only problem is the distance.

Well, enter Raychel. Cute girl that I've liked for a while (since I got to this country) and have known for a month or so. She's on the rebound after a 19-month relationship with some pseudo-goth guy, and I'm the rebound after the 6-month thing with Jess. Needless to say, sparks fly...

...and boy do they...

This girl is a firecracker. Kinda kinky, a little slutty, and screams like a porn star. Holy zombie Jesus.

Now, I love Jess, and Jess loves me, but frankly, she can't compete with this girl as far as intimacy is concerned. I'm not going out with Raychel, and we're not going to (yeah, she's not too keen on breaking into another relationship after 19 months...). Jess is coming to visit in the summer. She doesn't know about this yet.

So the question here is, should she? I'm not going to blow off Jess (she's just too important to me), but I'm not too keen on letting this opportunity with Raychel pass me by. It's probably just some temporary thing. So, should Jess know?

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Now if you'll excuse me, there's a bottle in the cupboard with my name on it.
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editor Search for posts by this member.
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PostIcon Posted on: May 19 2002,15:03 Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

no.
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ic0n0 Search for posts by this member.
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PostIcon Posted on: May 19 2002,15:06 Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

What she doesn't know can not harm her, your not going out with jess so what is the prob? Unless things begin to get real close again with her she doesn't need to know.

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"I don't have the evidence to prove that God doesn't exist, but I so strongly suspect he doesn't that I don't want to waste my time." (Isaac Asimov)
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Necromancer Search for posts by this member.
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PostIcon Posted on: May 19 2002,15:58 Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

no don't tell. her. this new girl is the equivalent of a walking talking porn collection. you never let your g/f find out about it :).

Sidenote: this is the point where you think about going double or nothing. you can try for a threesome, most men chose the easy way out and stick with the one gurl but i say he who dares wins ! devil.gif

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There'll be time for explanations later... and hopefully, some sex
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demonk Search for posts by this member.
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PostIcon Posted on: May 19 2002,18:21 Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Ok, I'm going to be the first guy to say 'yes'.  If you do love her, and you do want to be with Jess, tell her.  But don't go at it as if you have to apologize for anything.  Just tell her that you have been with another girl and that it has given you some perspective on how you feel towards her.  Since it sounds like you have no plans on dating this other girl, and it does sound like you want to be with Jess, you need to be honest with her.  But again, since you two were not dating at the time, it's nothing you need to apologize for.  Also, if you go at it like it was something you are glad you did, she might look at you differently.  Might start seeing you as someone with a back bone and someone she might loose if she isn't careful.  Of course, there is no 'right' way to do most things in life, and this is just how I would aproach this situation.  Just make sure that you are getting what you want/need.  If Jess can't provide it or is unwilling to provide it, then you need to look else where.

Just my $0.02

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I'm just two people short of a threesome!
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 Post Number: 6
Beldurin Search for posts by this member.
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PostIcon Posted on: May 20 2002,04:36 Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

I'm with demonk.  Relationships and love cannot exist without honesty.  At least, that's what I believe.

demonk's $0.02
+
beldurin's $0.02
                 
            $0.04

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If someone's ungrateful and you tell him he's ungrateful, okay, you've called him a name.  You haven't solved anything.  -- zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance
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 Post Number: 7
Wolfguard Search for posts by this member.
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PostIcon Posted on: May 20 2002,13:23 Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Quote (Uberkommando @ 19 May 2002,02:23)
Jess, my gf in Germany, broke up with me two months ago

as of last week, is going out with one of my best friends.

This girl is a firecracker. Kinda kinky, a little slutty, and screams like a porn star. Holy zombie Jesus.

First line should put things in their place.  Your broken up.

Second line enforces the first.  She is dating someone else.

So, what business of her's is the third line?

She left you.  She is dating.  If you want to have fun dont let it bother you.  Enjoy the ride and keep your mouth shut.

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 Post Number: 8
liquid metal Search for posts by this member.
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PostIcon Posted on: May 20 2002,14:40 Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Quote

Now, I love Jess, and Jess loves me


that line complicates everything wolfy.
he thinks (knows?) that jess loves him. he should find that out for sure first.
cuz if she did...distance wouldn't mean shit.

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hi
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 Post Number: 9
Wolfguard Search for posts by this member.
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PostIcon Posted on: May 20 2002,16:30 Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

and she is dating to prove her love?

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Fucknuggets flamed while you wait.
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 Post Number: 10
The_Stomper Search for posts by this member.
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PostIcon Posted on: May 20 2002,17:19 Skip to the previous post in this topic.  Ignore posts   QUOTE

Point for Wolfy there. She broke up with you, she's dating another guy; why the hell should you feel the need to tell her that you've got a lady friend?

By all means, if you really want to commit sexual suicide go ahead and tell her - but I recommend against it.

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